Y’know how just a matter of days ago I wrote a post about the gay scene in Silom, Bangkok, but neglected to write about the seedier massage and sex show joints because in my own words “that business is not for me”. Well scrap that – just a few days after writing those words, my halo snapped in half and where did I find myself? Watching a gay sex show in a Bangkok club. I’m not trying to make excuses for going to see it, but it wasn’t on my agenda at all, and my reason for going was being led by a Couchsurfing chum I was hanging out with. Curiosity got the better of me, and I was lead on to Soi Pratuchai (or Soi Twilight as it is otherwise known), where most of the gay massage places and sex shows are located.
The particular bar I went into was called Hot Male Bar – does what it says on the tin. I was led up stairs that had some of the grubbiest, frayed carpet I have ever laid my eyes upon. I guess the clientele has more pressing matters on their mind and weren’t as fussed as me about the cleanliness of the carpet, but the neat-freak in me wanted to gip. Ushered inside by one of the wait staff, I ordered a beer that cost 280 baht, which is over 4 times as much as I paid in the last regular bar I was sat in. This was when my first pang of guilt set in, as my 280 baht was effectively being used to support the sex trade in Bangkok – not something to be proud of.
Soi Twilight.
The seating in Hot Male Bar and apparently in all of these places is “in the round” so that everyone can get a decent look at the main attraction. The first act on the stage was a group of lean Thai guys (they all had ridiculously great bodies) in white underwear who were soaped up from head to toe. In all of their soapy glory they would make subtle and slow movements dancing on stage, so it was almost like watching a contemporary dance performance rather than a sex show. There were no hard willies – in this particular performance they didn’t even get them out. The dancers were incredibly skilled, and watching this, it was of some comfort to me to know that they were more than just sex toys to be bought. The choice of music for the dance was supremely bizarre though – “Fly By” by Blue – a not particularly amazing track by a British R&B/pop group from the early 2000s! Music choices here are generally bizarre. The most WTF? moment for me was a guy taking another guy’s cock into his hand and lip syncing along to Westlife’s “My Love” into it like it was a microphone. That is some crazy shit.
The next “performance” (and I use the term loosely) provided me with a firm reminder that I was not only watching a sex show, but that everyone and everything I saw on stage was for sale. About 15 guys were paraded around the stage in their tiny white briefs, with their permanent hard-ons poking out of the top of their underwear, and on those briefs they had badges with printed numbers. These poor guys were reduced to being numbers, and a host shouted out their numbers to the crowd like I was at a sex raffle, and I guess I was. They all had smiling faces and were being playful, winking to the crowd, but I can’t bring myself to believe they were actually happy up there doing that.
And then of course there was the actual live sex on stage. The performance space was equipped with monkey bars and gymnast rings and the performers were not afraid to use them. They managed to get themselves into positions that I had no idea existed. All a bit too energetic for me – I won’t be installing monkey bars in my bedroom any time soon. The first two pairs having sex simultaneously on stage included drag queens, and the next pair were simply as they were with no make-up or wigs. I’ve never watched anybody having sex before and I didn’t find it a turn on. Again, I guess that’s because I knew they were ultimately for sale.
You get the idea.
So my curiosity got the better of me, I went to a live sex show in Bangkok. It’s not something that I’m particularly proud of and it’s not something I’d engage with again. Would you?
11 comments
Roberto Cantu says:
Jan 6, 2013
That is what Bangkok is famous for. Its similar to what happens in Amsterdam and their windows which display beautiful prostitutes with top-model looks. They are also for sale and provide a service of sex and entertainment.
I guess you have to live your experience with an open mind or avoid visiting this kind of cities all together.
I do not particularly agree with it, but if prostitution is a trade that has existed for so many years, I do welcome a better rights and regulation for the people who work in this industry rather than condemning it all together.
Prostitution in the history of mankind has always existed and will always exist. Maybe Tai people are a more tolerant and open society to homosexuality and diversity? If so, I think that is something to celebrate. Perhaps they just need to regulate their night-time economy a bit better.
That Gay Backpacker says:
Jan 6, 2013
I put this on FB, but I’ll copy it here for the benefit of the blog readers…
I think they should have rights. But that doesn’t mean this is good for them or they like it. They’re more likely to be raped, they’re more likely to have been abused as kids – I don’t think it should be something celebrated as a product of an open, tolerant society.
Adam says:
Jan 6, 2013
Very interesting to read about this! I skipped a lot of the sex-related stuff when I was in Bangkok. Not sure I’d go, but it was interesting to hear what it’s like in those places.
Joshua says:
Jan 6, 2013
Wow that’s pretty surreal. I understand what you mean about them being reduced to numbers – its bad enough back home haveing someone heavily hit on you and going on about how into you they are without acknowledging you are a person with a name (if they even know it is a start), life story, dreams, ambitions etc. Thanks, that was really informative.
That Gay Backpacker says:
Jan 7, 2013
So pleased you guys like the article. I mean, obviously a lot of folk who go there don’t think about whether it’s right or wrong, so I’m pleased at least that the experience made me alert to some kind of internal moral compass.
Gary Moore says:
Feb 14, 2013
I enjoyed the articles as I do all of your blogs. I agree with your comments about the sex bars and clubs. I have been to a couple and have always felt saddened when you see the guys with the numbers on. It is also right that as a society we should not condemn but neither should we accept it as a choice for the boys. It is exploitation. well said mate
That Gay Backpacker says:
Feb 14, 2013
Gary you’ve totally hit the nail on the head by saying that we should not condemn the boys but also have to acknowledge that they are being exploited. Thank you so much for reading.
J says:
Mar 11, 2013
Why did you really go- no one forced you? It seemed like you enjoyed it but are pretending to hate the exploitation. DUDE you exploited them and perpetuate the system……..
Sorry. You should be…..
That Gay Backpacker says:
Mar 11, 2013
Well, this is exactly what I’m saying if you read the post. I really went out of curiosity, and while some of it was entertaining, it ultimately left a bad taste in my mouth. So I wouldn’t go again.
Tuscan says:
Apr 25, 2013
Well I’m currently in Bangkok considering to go or not….absolutely out of curiosity….the straights have Thai females popping ping pong balls… What do the gays have?
I too am curious to see and I curiouser to see my reaction. I’m not sure if I will walk out immediately or if ill enjoy it and even purchase a number!
Good on you for writing about it and having the courage too but Prostitution is an age old industry and has traditionally exploited the weaker sex who up to only a century ago couldn’t even vote while homos were only in the closet.
we are now men exploding men or worse boys – shouldn’t we see this exploitation for what it is and fight to regulate it as we have done with so many of the vises humanity has?
If we don’t, things will only get worse, the immoral will become more immoral behind closed doors – doors which you and I are welcome to look behind but choose not to due to our own insecurities, disgust, prejudgment or fear.
It up to us to set our societies morality – ignoring it or pretending its not there is not the answer.
That Gay Backpacker says:
Apr 26, 2013
Whatever you do, please don’t buy a boy!